So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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