I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
wow bdsm is so cute
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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