Pappa wants mamma naked
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
