he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize
