sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
