Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
