Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Randomize