Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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