Me too!
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
