What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Randomize
