So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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