He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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