Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
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