this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize
