id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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