My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
