I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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