Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I love you. Go after that dick
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
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