peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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