forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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