"it" just moved
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Randomize
