In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
