I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
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