they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
