1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
