So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize