Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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