Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
