its not stalking. its research.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I think pants incapable of making pants work
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
