why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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