dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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