Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
