im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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