Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
