protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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