never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
