Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize
