The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
