Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
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