Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
