This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
The air was thick with penises
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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