dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
