You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
