Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Randomize