I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Randomize
