go do what you do best...puke behind churches
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
i was born a porn star she said
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
