Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
