I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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