why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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