The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
