I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
